How Self-Compassion Can Help With Taking Yourself Too Seriously
- amandabek
- 3 days ago
- 2 min read
Updated: 2 days ago
Are you taking yourself too seriously? Well, here are some signs you might be:
(a) holding high expectations for yourself
(b) often worrying about small aspects of life
(c) thinking about the worst-case scenario before anything
(d) experiencing high levels of frustration
Why do we take ourselves too seriously? In this success-driven era, perfectionism is often viewed as a glamorous trait. Since young, we have always been fed with stories of individuals who seem to be effortless in juggling unattainable standards and we grow to idolise them, their relentless pursuits of perfection. In truth, the heavy pressure to conform to unrealistic standards can put a toll on the shoulders of perfectionists, and leave them feeling constricted by the very standards they aim to achieve.
Of note, perfectionism is a healthy personality trait, however, it can become toxic if we overly depend on perfectionism while abandoning our true selves. How do we then recalibrate and achieve a balance for our health?
According to research, one notable way to tackle perfectionism is going through Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT). CFT integrates ideas from evolutionary psychology and et cetera, intervention from therapies such as Cognitive behavioural Therapy (CBT), and meditative practices. CFT can help to disarm the psychological mechanisms that give rise to self-criticism and perfectionism through tools to approach, understand and work with one’s inner critic, reframe negative self-perception and replace them with self-compassion. Cultivating a compassionate mind can weaken the grip of self-critical thoughts and at the same time adopt a healthier view of yourself.
Essentially, it is okay to be a perfectionist but like all things in life, it is crucial to have a balance. When perfectionism gets too much of a hold on you, embracing self-compassion can be a good way to find your way back to yourself and recalibrate your wellbeing.
Written by: Jolene
12/2024
References
Balanced Minds. (2024, March 22). How CFT can overcome imposter syndrome. https://balancedminds.com/cft-and-imposter-syndrome/#:~:text=CFT%20aims%20to%20disarm%20the,%2Djudgement%20with%20self%2Dcompassion.
Catriona, C., Syd, H., & Aimee, S. (n.d.). Compassion focused therapy: A systematic review of its effectiveness and acceptability in clinical populations. Expert review of neurotherapeutics. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32196399/
Dankaert, D. E. (2024, April 23). Behind the mask: The truth on perfectionism. Medium. https://esmarildad.medium.com/behind-the-mask-the-truth-on-perfectionism-150f4b76cb96
Vogel, K. (2024, November 1). 9 ways to stop taking life too seriously. Psych Central. https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to-stop-taking-yourself-so-seriously#how-to-stop
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